Last week I folded my laundry!!!
What? No applause? ! I know, no big deal, right? The thing is, and this is a little embarrassing to admit, it was actually a very big deal. If you've ever felt stuck, unable to motivate yourself to do something, anything you need or even want to do, then you can understand. Maybe it’s a project for work. Doing your taxes, preparing for a journey or perhaps it’s a long held vision for your life. Yet, somehow there are too many blocks in your way. Fears of not being enough. Stories of “this is too hard or too big” or “I don’t know how”, or “nobody will love or approve of me, I’ll be outcast and abandoned.” Your stories may be different entirely. Perhaps you don’t even know what those stories are because they are buried so deep in your psyche. The outcome however ranges from not getting a few things done to seriously impeding, having the life you envision for yourself.
When I was a child, I remember reading Discover magazine and seeing the Mensa tests inside. I would think, "Hey I can do these!" But the thought of putting in that much concentration felt exhausting, excruciating even. I wondered, "Why is it something I know I can do, yet it feels so toxic to even attempt?" It would be many decades before I would get an ADD diagnosis with treatment. But ADD itself was and is not the really big issue.That is simply part of my story and we all have our own stories. Throughout my life I developed lots of coping mechanisms and created all kinds of stories of "not enoughness" or "I don't know how" or "It's too hard" to protect me from having to do what felt like "too much". Fears of being embarrassed and at the core of not being loved or valued limited my world and what i allowed myself to accomplish.
In my newsletter a few weeks ago I spoke of how frustrated I initially felt during shelter in place. After the disappointment of having to cancel my trip to the Everglades, I had been excited to have the time to get to all those things done, I never managed to get to. And instead, I ended up disappointed by my own ingrained habits of procrastination, distraction and overwhelm. Using EFT Tapping, I unearthed my wounds of “not enoughness”, “I don’t know how” and more that lie beneath the patterns.
As I spoke to previously EFT Tapping has been such a gift at reprogramming my brain. In the past few months I’ve set up my first ever morning routine,(starting with 5 minutes and now lasting a full hour. It includes breathing exercises, mindfulness, resistance and flexibility training, journaling, tapping and more. i’ve been starting my day with this new routine without fail. That’s something I’ve wanted to do for years but until now, it had never become anything more than another unfulfilled desire. I’ve taken up speed reading which has been a goal for decades. I learned to juggle with the juggling set I bought and has sat unused for the last 6 years. I’ve been guiding weekly virtual forest therapy walks despite all the fears and resistance I had to doing so. I’ve put in place systems to accomplish what I want throughout the day and the week. In short I’ve moved myself from a place where I lacked the self confidence that I would do something I set before me, to knowing I can set a goal and complete it. To actually trust in my own ability to get things done in a way I never have before. And maybe even make the process fun. It’s a whole new paradigm.
That's why folding my laundry was such a big deal. It's one of those things that felt too hard. In fact, I've rarely ever folded a full load of laundry and never in one sitting. For years I had piles on the floor of my room where I was never truly sure where dirty ended and clean began. Then over a decade ago I built shelves, just so I could keep myself from having to fold and instead just throw the clothes into organized sections on the shelves without folding them. Last week when I folded my load of laundry, there was no efforting, no pushing past feelings of discomfort. It just came easily, a complete non event. And that is what made it such an event. Previously,when my mind said something was going to be difficult, which was its default position, I just assumed that meant don’t even bother. I didn’t know challenging or better yet reframing or letting go of those thoughts was an option. And even if I had that awareness, I didn't have the tools to make the changes I desired. Instead I spent decades reinforcing the faulty software of those thoughts and my blind obedience to them. So while seemingly small, folding my laundry is emblematic of how much I've managed to shift the operating system in my brain.
I’m still evolving, still developing and installing new empowering patterns. If I falter, I choose to see it as a learning moment. I am compassionate with myself and I have the tools to move past and eliminate my blocks. I'm often taken by how much flow and ease I have where little to none existed before. And in such a short time too. If you'll let me, I can support you in having those tools as well, giving you a new sense of freedom, self confidence and self assurance. The ability to manifest exactly what you desire. Join me this Sunday for my workshop on Moving Beyond Procrastination, Distraction and Overwhelm with EFT Tapping. We'll use EFT Tapping to turn down the volume on the blocks to your productivity so we can banish them for good. Clearing the path to finally be living the life of your dreams.
