Nature & Wellbeing Meditations Blog
Why Beating Yourself Up Isn’t Helping—And What To Do Instead
It’s human to beat ourselves up when we feel we’ve wronged ourselves or someone else. Perhaps we think we deserve punishment or it's the path to preventing mistakes in the future. That might briefly work. But the long term result is to create stress in our nervous system. But what if we could forgive ourselves? What might be possible?
It's common and it’s human when you're feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, or simply out of sync, that what comes out is a vague complaint or an explosion of stress. "I'm so stressed," "This is too much," or "Why is everything so difficult?" While these statements may accurately reflect your internal state, they often fall short in helping you get what you truly need.
Of course it makes sense evolutionarily to want to be liked. When we lived in small tribes in the wilderness, not being liked or being cast out to survive on our own could literally cost us our lives. But that is not true in the modern world and in fact trying to be liked by everyone all the time comes at a great cost.
Join the Permission To Be Your Full Self Listening Party!
Come hang out for a 90-minute Zoom event where we'll listen to the first powerful episode of Permission To Be Your Full Self.
Pausing throughout, we'll dive into an open discussion around the topics of self-acceptance, letting go of fear, and embracing the messy, beautiful experience of being a human as well as anything else that arises for you as we listen.
If you've ever felt held back by self-doubt or the fear of being judged, this is a space to connect, reflect, and celebrate ourselves.
Date: Sunday March 2nd
Time: 4:30 - 6:00pm
Giving ourselves permission to "fuck it up" is a powerful mindset shift. It breaks down the rigid standards we often impose on ourselves, born from fear of judgment or failure, and reminds us that growth rarely happens without stumbles.
When we consciously allow ourselves to make mistakes, we invite authenticity, learning, and resilience into our lives.
In a world overflowing with advice and tried-and-true methods, we’re often told what we should do by experts, influencers, or even our closest friends. But following these “shoulds” without first checking in with ourselves can lead to frustration or self-doubt.
We may find ourselves pushing through actions that feel misaligned, merely because they worked for someone else. Instead…
Tired of Seeking Approval? Here's The Confidence Hack You Didn’t Know You Needed.
We live in a world where validation often comes from external sources—whether it’s social media likes, approval from family and friends, or professional recognition. While external forms of validation can feel good, they lead us to seek constant outside approval. Self-celebration allows you to feel confident and grounded in who you are, regardless of external feedback.
It can be hard to accept praise sometimes or to fully acknowledge ourselves.
There’s a whole spectrum from fully embracing it to it feeling toxic for some to only accepting acknowledgement to a certain threshold. The reasons for this can be varied and vast from fear of appearing arrogant to discomfort with attention, past trauma, cultural or familial expectations and more.
Every time you set a boundary and break it, you erode the foundation of self-trust. Your brain quickly learns that the promises you make to yourself are negotiable. The more this pattern repeats, the less credibility your own word holds. You start doubting your ability to stay committed, and soon, other boundaries you’ve set—whether it's around relationships, habits, or self-care—begin to feel more fluid.
Explore the concept of "trap-lining," a foraging behavior observed in animals like sapsuckers and how it relates to modern phone addiction. This article delves into the psychological aspects of compulsive app-checking, drawing parallels to the Buddhist concept of "hungry ghosts." Learn how this behavior can be a manifestation of deeper issues, such as feelings of "not enoughness" or searching for missing emotional connections. Discover practical strategies for breaking this cycle, including mindfulness techniques, self-compassion, and habit-tracking methods. Gain insights into how awareness and journaling can lead to powerful personal changes and improved digital well-being.
As I made my way in a wide circle out around mushroom rock in the direction of Mavericks the enormous man eating waves were coming at me from every angle. Still I struggled onward. There were massive explosions of surf all around me. My head was below the water more than it was above, even when i was still upright!! It seemed as if Poseiden himself were rising from the depths and trying to skewer me with his trident.
Have you ever feel a sense of discomfort when trying something new? We've all been there. It can be disconcerting to try new things or to not know how and to risk failure or simply not being proficient. Especially if we will be witnessed in our fallibility or knowledge/skill gap. Who wants to be confronted with a perceived lack?
